Previous Entry Share Next Entry
Daily Rant 001: Children and the Internet (Mature Language)
fawksiepuppet
 Let me start off with this: The Internet is NOT a kid-friendly place. GET OVER IT.

Now, to go back to how this started...

My sister, who'll be 17 next April, posted up a little comment on her Facebook. Something completely harmless. 

‎"tell him if he drive by kisses you again im gonna drive by smack him!" LMFAO!!! MY DAD IS HILARIOUS!

Now, I'm just kinda looking through all the comments on her page and I see this comment from her uncle by marriage... (I won't dive into the complexities of our family relationship because you'll become vastly confused)

Language Charli. Lets keep it PG for the kids

Now... FOR FUCKING REAL? It is not my 16 YEAR OLD sisters fault that you let your children, BOTH under 12, have a fucking Facebook. I'm pretty sure there is an age limit on that shit, anyway. If there isn't, there definitely SHOULD be. For real. Children have enough social interaction on the playground. At school. Children spend the vast majority of the YEAR in a building FULL of other children. Why the fuck do they need to come home and get on the internet and talk to those same children.

Like I said before, the Internet is not a kid-friendly zone. It's full of creepers and pedos and other kinds of strange people that kids shouldn't be exposed to. Don't bother arguing this fact, because you know it's true. Just because you don't WANT it to be true doesn't mean that it isn't. Get out of your little bubble, America. The world is NOT rainbows and sunshine. 

The Internet is huge.
The Internet is Anonymous.
The Internet doesn't give a fuck if your feelings get hurt over the content of it's several trillion pages. 

There are tons of people who will actually rejoice at the chance to corrupt and ruin your innocent child. Places like 4chan. IT'S WHAT THEY DO. You can't stop them. Don't even try.

And don't be stupid and think that you can stop your kids from going to those sites without access to a military-grade firewall.

'Oh, but I talk to my kids about Internet safety and I know they would never go to those sites because we talked about how dangerous they are...'

YOU'RE A FUCKING IDIOT.

Because you talked to your kids about those sites, they are going to be more eager than ever to go to them. They wanna see what it's like on the other side of the fence. And don't think that because you're an adult, you know more about the internet. Your child will always know at least 10 to 15 MORE ways to do something on the internet than you will. Face it. The web is ever-changing and evolving, and you are not going with it. Don't believe me?

Invite a child over that is 2 years younger than your own child and put that kid on the internet. I guarantee that  that neighbor kid is going to show your kid at least 3 to 5 new ways to do something that your own kid never knew. That's just the way it goes.

And by the way, your child now has at least 13 ways to go watch porn on the Internet that you will never know about.

'How can I avoid this horrible fate?'

You can't. Get over it. 

Even if you have a child that is willing to listen to you and not go to those sites, that kid still has to go to school with other kids. And at some point in the computer lab, the kid at the next computer over is going to say 'Hey, wanna see something cool?'

Sure, your kid might say 'No, my mommy says I'm not allowed to look at anything cool online.', Your kid might put up a beautiful resistance to peer pressure for several days, maybe even a few weeks. But eventually, he or she is going to get sick of the teasing that ensues from this 'mama's boy/girl' attitude and your child is going to approach that kid and say 'Hey, show me that cool thing'.

Why?

Because your child wants to be accepted by his or her peers. It's human nature to crave the approval of others, despite what some emo kids would have you think. EVERYONE wants approval. You want it from your boss, your friends, your significant other. Why should kids be any different? Kids want it even more than you. They are trying to figure out where they belong in life. 

So that kid shows your kid a video of two people fucking. Or of some girl throwing puppies in a river. Or Zippo Cat. Or any of the other millions of terrible things on the WORLD WIDE WEB. And at first, your kid may shy away from these things. But these things can't be unseen. Pretty soon, that 'cool kid' at school is conditioning your child to like these horrible things, and your kid is then showing and conditioning other children.

And whether you like it or not, you can't protect your kid all the time. Sure, there may be firewalls at the school, and you might supervise your kids at home.

But I see gaggles of 8 to 10 year old girls at the mall, giggling and crowding around a Blackberry now. Most cell phones now can't even be used unless they have a data package with them, where Internet comes standard. You can't escape it, and neither can your precious little angel of innocence and sunshine.

So how do we fix this issue?

Remember, back in the 90s, when kids went OUTSIDE and PLAYED? Remember shit like that? Remember when small children didn't get cell phones and laptops? 

I didn't get my first cell phone until I was 14, and I only got one because I had a very full schedule of activities, and my mom needed to get a hold of me. And it was a tiny little Nokia POS that had a number pad, an call button and a hang-up button. I didn't even get text messaging until I was 16, and I was only given 200 a month.

I didn't get my first computer until I was 16. And I STILL have that computer. 

When I was a little girl, my mom made me go OUTSIDE to play. We had a computer that ran Windows 98, and I was allowed to use it for an hour a day so that I could play Neopets. Otherwise, I had to go outside and play with my friends at the park. And we played in the sand box, rolled around in the grass.

We came home filthy, but we didn't know anything about porn. We didn't know that terrible things happened in the world. We didn't wear make-up. Our biggest concern was if we would be able to get our Pokemon cards to fit in our backpack the next day so that we could have some epic trading time at recess.

SEND YOUR FUCKING CHILDREN OUTSIDE, AMERICA. TAKE AWAY THE XBOX 360 AND THE PS3 AND THE WII AND THE INTERNET AND MAKE YOUR KIDS PLAY SOME FUCKING TAG.

AND THEN SEND THEM TO THE HOSPITAL BECAUSE YOUR CHILDREN ARE FAT AND HAVE NEVER HAD TO PLAY OUTSIDE BEFORE AND THEY JUST HAD AN ASTHMA ATTACK BECAUSE YOU ARE A HORRIBLE FUCKING PARENT.

Daily Rant 001 finished.

?

Log in